Recurring Reverie

It's just after 8 am now; I just had my breakfast. My therapist said I should take shower before 9 am but before that, I should fill up my tummy. I woke up early, considering it's Friday. Something budged me off my sleep. Still playing in my head now really ...

I had the same dream before, a strange dream in fact. Should I say it's a nightmare, I am not sure myself. In that dream, I saw a woman. A sad mother. Haunted with fear all the time. Not of fear for her life, but for her children. I couldn't see clearly how many kids she had but it was sure many; maybe 5 or 6. All of about 5 to 16 years old, I am not sure.

Strangely, the same vision recurred last night. A young man tried to help her and her children to escape from a sort of, mansion. They struggled going onto a boat. They were smiling with relief when they finally left the dock. Bags were on their backs, even the small ones had theirs.

The relieved faces turned dark, filled with extreme fear and panic, when ahead of them, a man coming out of the bush near the river they were crossing. He had a calm face, his strong jaws were moving. Both his hands were in his pockets. In a split second, boats followed behind them to wherever they headed. The innocent children took cover by bending down their knees with hands covering their heads. The young ones started crying while mum concoled them. "We'll be alright" look was shown on the face of the young man who attempted to help the woman and her children.

The chasing continued and finally their boat harboured. They started running into town, a small town it seemed. This might sound funny but it looked like an old town of Brunei. The weird part was, they were wearing modern clothes ... Back to the story, groups of men greeted them onland. Wherever they went, they'd appear out of nowhere. The children gasped and cried running along their mother and the rescuer.

With the sight of a police station (it seemed), on their sides were men with scary looks. Among them was 'the man', the one who once stood in the bushes. The group froze. Even the rescuer couldn't move.

I woke up, panicking too ...

Two in One

My day was rather 'worrying'. Work was a bit slow in the morning, having not much to do, just up-dating this and that for the afternoon's meeting. In between this 'passive' session, I was playing with my ring in my left finger [which I shall say, a sign of boredom!]. It was then during this time I folded my fingers and with eyes wide-opened, I saw my fat chubby fingers SHAKING, by themselves!!! :S I had to grab them to make them stop shaking. Worried, I kept folding, grabbing, and folding my fingers again, trying to figure out what actually happened. I stretched my arm and folded them again, still, they were shaking like hell! What's happening?? I kept asking myself that and cold sweat started flowing down my face. Am I NOT alright??

I showed my shaking fingers to the BLA. They were scared too :S All thoughts came in; it might be the cause of stress, blood pressure, and one even boldly said it could be a sign of heart problem [thanks pal! That really helped! :S]. The rest of the day, I kept 'exercising' my fingers, even in between the meeting that I had to attend this afternoon.

After the meeting, I picked up Mamashasha at her place and we had an early dinner at Ceri Cafe. It was her first time there and it's my third. She loved the place and food :) She paid for the meals and drinks, saying it's my birthday present hehehe :p Thanks dearie! :) See the pix here!

Later on, we went to Firoz Jaya and I successfully persuaded her to buy a piece of cloth hehe :p Come on! It's only $22 darlin! ;) I sent her home at after 6pm and Shasha greeted me with a sniff [she loves me for letting her play with the MSN winks. Her favourite is the one with the crying boy, hence the 'sniffing' hehe]. I hung out there for a few minutes and I left with a BIG HUG from Shasha :D Love that kid so much!!!

By 7 pm, I was with Shahrul seeing my therapist, asking her what was wrong with my 'shaking' fingers. She concluded that I had nerve clots in my palm but she couldn't give me the theraphy unless I had a sauna for a few minutes first. I did have saunas few years ago and I kind of disliked it but this time, the sauna was really relaxing and people! I was dripping!!! And I love that feeling as I rarely sweat when I did any exercises. Eventually, the sauna today lasted 45 minutes and I felt much much better!! :)

The next hour, I had my nerve theraphy, after a few minutes of lying down. My therapist said, after sauna, one should cool down first before any massage is done as our nerves are still warm and the blood circulation is progressing actively. Even the massage after sauna should not be done thoroughly. Massage should be done slowly and only massaging the relaxing nerves. The back should not be touched at all or else, the next day it would be really hard to move. Waaa! Really a lesson for me today :) It was indeed a relaxing moment and I slept right away :)

Before going home, Shahrul and I had dinner at Singapore Chicken Rice Restaurant [Yea! Yea! I know! Lapar kali ah lapas massage! :p]. I am overworked, stressed and tired so my nerves are trembling, especially my left side as I am having problem with my left shoulder. My next theraphy will be this Monday. That's another $50 ... Ndapalah! Janji baik :)

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=== Though 'worried', still crept a smile on my face. Always had a good time with Mamashasha! :) Love you girl!! ===

=== Haha! It's her first time using her camera's 'automatic timer'! Thanks to me!! :p ===

=== Hers is Ice Lemon Tea, mine is Caramel Cafe Late Shake ===

=== Hey! It's not what you think! She's on a diet kali ah! Hehe :p ===

=== My early dinner - Lamb Black Pepper with Rice ===

=== Mine and hers - Mango Chicken with Rice ===

=== Ceri Cafe, the inside. Not bad huh!

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"THE SAUNA THERAPHY"

=== All smiley but extremely warm inside ===

=== "Steaming" my tired face ===

=== My all-sweaty face. I was dripping people! ===

=== The Sauna itself. Really relaxing my nerves ===

Wife Search Dilemma: Dedicated to Abdul

I know the topic sends irony in you but believe me, it is happening in this century still.

Abdul is a dear friend of mine. Born as an Afghan, he's brought up well, educated and loved by all. One thing that I respect about this man is, how he waited for his sisters to enter the world of marriage yet to have his own. Now that they're happily married, it's time for his turn. Unfortunately for him, as he always said, it's not easy to search a wife.

What happened really? He's got the looks, the brains and the job. He's also got a good foundation, having a strong faith in Allah. And today, we talked about the video I wrote about in my previous post. I am so glad knowing he's against that kind of punishment. Having done his research on that before, he condemns those who said it's allowed by Islamic Law. It is actually a practice done by tribes to protect them from shame. When I asked him whether it still happens there or not, unfortunately, he said, it happens EVERYDAY there in Afghanistan ... Shocking!

The punishments are done either by stoning, beating or hanging the 'sinners' to death. More shockingly, the practice is carried out without guilt and if ever those punished are still alive after being stoned, they'll be 'allowed' to live but if they end up dead, they'll be buried and left forgotten as 'shame' is now erased.

Now, who are the 'sinners'? They include those who enjoy even a 5 minute conversation between a non-mahram male and female. If they're caught talking, both are 'entitled' for the punishments. If ever a boy says a name of a non-mahram girl, questions will raise - Do you know the girl? How do you know the girl? Have you ever talked to the girl? Allah knows what will happen to the boy ... and the girl ...

So, back to my poor Afghan friend here, it's been difficult for him to search for a wife. We know what will happen if he ever approaches a girl right? So, the only solution is, arranged marriage. It took all his effort to find husbands for his sisters but it is more difficult to find a wife for himself. Adding to this, the 'practice', which is culturally 'legal' in his country, has made it even more complicated for him to ever find someone to spend his life with.

Knowing Abdul for almost a year now, I learnt that he is a very caring person. A family type guy even - a kind that is becoming extinct nowadays.

Our conversation today ended with me asking him "What would you do if your sister ever fell in love with a guy and you found out about it. Will you 'punish' her too like the others do?"

His answer carved a wide smile on my face. He said "I would never allow it done to my sister. If I caught her in that condition, I would marry them and try my very best to keep it from spreading. I am an educated man Suzi."

Alhamdulillah. I have finally found someone who agrees with me, who, ironically, comes from those countries that still see 'the practice' legal.

Alhamdulillah ...

My Girlfriend's Wedding

I met Ayut back in College. We were in the same Sociology class. She's a cute, friendly and nice girl, one of the many I met in College. On counting, we've been friends for 11 years! Wow! I just realized that!!!

Here are some of the pictures I snapped yesterday. I didn't bring my camera so I just used my humble phone ... Enjoy the pixies!! :) To Ayut and Shukri, I pray for your long lasting marriage, Amiiiiinnn ... :)

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=== A beauty on the aisle ===

=== A princess awaits her prince charming ===

=== Sweet aren't they :) ===

==== May Allah bless your marriage, Amiiinn ... ===

=== Azean, her time is soon, I predict ehheheh :p ===

=== Azean and me at the wedding ===

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As I mentioned in yesterday's post, I met Sharul after the wedding and went to a movie. We had dinner at Vintage Rose, a western food restaurant. It's my third time eating there. A real nice place to hang out and the food is not bad. Have a look here. Maybe it's the right place for you too :)

=== English antiques and furniture, giving different yet calming effects ===

=== My dinner ~ Homemade Spinach Pasta with Chicken and Mushroom Cream Sauce. I had Oreo Shakes as well. Worth the price. You should try!! ===

... Mixed Feelings ...

Today I was greatly affected by the most disturbing video I have ever seen. Even talking about it breaks my heart into pieces... It was my brother who showed it to me this morning when I was preparing myself for Ayut's wedding. I had to stop watching, not wanting to see the ending of it.

Rumours had it that the 'incident' happened in Malaysia. It was about this young girl assaulted, beaten, kicked, you name it, by a circle of men! My brother said the girl left her fiance a week before they got married and got back to her ex-boyfriend. The ex-fiance, who was a gangster, I supposed, was not satisfied thus 'the incident' happened. She died eventually after her head was stoned. Even when I am typing this, I can still visualize the bruises on her thighs. Yes ... She was half naked too ... Sad but true. What's worse, she was only 17 ... Such a young age ... :'(

Back to my room, I went online with mixed feeling. I detest any bad treatment on women. We should be protected, NOT ... Well anyway, I saw Edib online. He's Zean's cousin who is a Malaysian. So, I asked him whether it was true. He told me to check a video up on Youtube. There, I saw the same video! This time, shown on CNN.

Apparently, the incident happened in an Iraqi province, not in Malaysia! The girl fell in love with a guy from a different sect, which was, according to the report, against their cultures. Hence, the killing, which they argued to be a 'punishment honoured by the Holy Koran'. Astarghfirullahal'aziiim ... As far as I know, and I am 100% sure, that such 'punishment' is NOT written in our Holy Book! I've never heard of any surahs saying THAT!! Assaulting a weak servant just because she fell in love with a 'forbidden' man. What's more killing her in public by tens of big men and simply watched by securities! Worst of all, she was half naked!! No laws in Islam saying anything of such punishment in any case!! Astarghfirullahal'aziiim!!!

This has really made my day! The whole scene kept playing in my head. Seeing Ayut smiling happily on the aisle also made my brain trace back to the poor girl. She could be smiling proudly as a bride today if ... and only if ... her family allowed her to live and marry her boyfriend. Families are supposed to protect us, especially women. NOT ... [Sigh! :'(]

I have mixed feelings. From Ayut's wedding, I met Sharul. I told him everything. He was speechless. Hurting women is just not his kind of thing. For 6 years we were together, he never raised his voice at me, what's more hurting me. Alhamdulillah ... Later today, we watched 'Iron Man' at Qlap Cineplex. I know he was trying to cheer me up but really, it haunted me in between the movie.

Just now, I chatted with Raheemah, a dear friend of mine, whom I seek advice on the matter. Not that I doubt our Holy Book but just trying to have an opinion about it, since she's one of the many religious girlfriends that I have. After the talking, I feel a bit relief now, though there's still a lump in my heart and a dent in my head on the scene that seems neverending in my brain. I hope I can get it to doze off later or else, I'd wake up with black cirles tomorrow ...

Ya Allah! I beg for your mercy on your humble servant for I am weak at heart who hopes for your loving attention. For you are the Greatest and Most Merciful. Forgive me My Lord ... :'(

Birthday Ladies Night Out ;)

Yup! As the topic indicates, I went out with my closest cuzzie tonight! Yanti picked me up at 7.30pm then off we went to the new cafe in town, Cheezbox! She had Pepper Lamb Chop and Mocha while I had Beef Spagetti Bolognese, Lamb Kebab and Caramel Cafe Latte. The place was cool (literally as well so we requested them to switch off the fan :p Nda paham! Haha).

While waiting for the order, Yanti fed me with her lovely birthday story. Her boyfriend took her out dinner at Airport Restaurant. Coincidently, Singaporean chefs were invited that day so her beautiful birthday started off with them lining up greeting the couple. They had dinner and before leaving, the chefs, waiters and waitresses brought a bouquet of pink roses and a love shaped cake to their table. She was all red when all eyes were on her, especially when the birthday song was sung hehe :p But of course, she's touched at the same time, I am sure! :)

Later that night, she got two presents from her romantic boyfriend (a Guess wallet and handbag!! Pheweeet!!). The most touching part was, which sent a bit of jealousy in me, when he said to her 'I want to see you happy'. Awwwwe . . Ain't he sweet! My eyes filled with happy tears hearing all these. Afterall those sad momento in her past love life, I am so happy for her now that she has found her true love. A true love that is also felt by him. Alhamdulillah for you my dear :)

We took some pictures, then rushed to The Mall Cineplex to watch Iron Man. We could only get free seats 6 rows from the screen so we decided not to watch it afterall. So, we went to the second floor to CD shops, not buying anything though. I was looking for Supernatural's new episode. It's been a month but it's not released yet. How frustrating!

Then off we went into a souvenir shop. I bought a small card for Ayut’s wedding gifts. Her wedding is tomorrow. I plan to go there with Zean and Hjh Lena. Yesterday, I bought her a wedding frame with a caption ‘It had to be you’ and a his and hers piggy bank. You can see the presents here :)

At the souvenir shop, Yanti bought a magnetic heart keychains, persuaded by me heheh :p It’s a pair of lovely keychains! She plans to give half of the ‘heart’ to her boyfriend (Ok everyone! AWWWE!!). Isn’t she sweet or what! She sent me home at after 10pm and we exchanged gifts before parted. Guess what I gave her! Hmm . . I gave her ‘Ayat-Ayat Cinta’ novel and I do hope she loves it cause I spend a long time looking for it :S I got a handbag in return, as if she knew I need a new one hehe :p Thanks darl!! Love ya!!

It sure was a wonderful birthday girls night out :) Girl! We’re 29, yes! But remember, it’s just a number! It’s a long way to go and I am sure, we’re gonna have a lot of fun all the way :D

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=== The Aries and the Taurus :) Happy 29th to us both!!! Tahun dapan kawin heheh :p ===

=== The fats we spoilt ourselves with tonight :S ===

=== We split the cost ;) ===

=== My new handbag ;) The keychain's cute!! Love it!! Thanks cousin kami!! Mwaahz!!! ===

=== Ayut's wedding gifts ===

Missions Accomplished!!

Hi people! Glad seeing you again but I gotta apologize cause I am going to say a bit about my job in this post. Yea! Yea! I know. Boring isn't it!! Grrrr!

So! Here goes! Remember the assignment on preparing a report for the committee that myself as the chairlady? You know, the one which we were told, the WRONGLY DONE one? Well, anyway! We met up again yesterday. Imagine! The meeting started at 8am till 12pm! It was sure a brain-damaging session! Even my butt seems flatter now!!

We managed to do the report by 10am and in the next 2 hours, we were discussing on our committee's action plan this year. It means, we've got more burdens coming huhu =( Just before 4pm, I showed the draft of the report to our Chief No1. He was impressed seeing it and told me to attend a meeting tomorrow morning with the head officers (they called themselves the 'A Team'. I know!! So where do I belong? The 'Z Team'??). I've got to present my committee's analysis, evaluation and suggestions on the assignment. One mission accomplished, another yet to come.

I went to bed late last night, preparing for the presentation. Today, I woke up at 8am, did some touch-ups on the report up till 11am. Danny called me up, reminding me about 'my' tasks for our camping this December. I did tell you all about the camping right? I didn't? Well, it's just approved by the Ministry and 24 Singaporeans will be joining the camp. The rest will be joined by the Bruneians. It's actually a second camping programme between Singapore and Brunei. I went to the first one in Singapore last year in November. This time, they're coming here, we as the host. So it's a big project that we've got to prepare everything now. Even tomorrow, I got to attend a meeting at the Ministry at 2pm, showing the heads 'our' tasks.

So, today, 2 missions accomplished! I went to the north, south, east and west (of Bandar Seri Begawan plang saja tu hehe :p) looking for travel agencies. One of the camping programmes is bringing the campers to visit the famous Kampong Ayer and water cruise seeing the proboscis monkey. So Danny and I had to ask for quotations for that. We got 3 travel agencies so far. Then I went seeking for quotations for the campers' caps, pouches and shirts. Also the banner and souvenirs. 3 quotations altogether for that from one company. I managed finding quotations from 2 companies. Having Ambuyat in between waiting for them doing it :p

Hmm ... By 5pm, all was done! What I am really thankful is, the spirit of supporting one another in business. I went to several companies looking for the quotations. When the companies didn't have what I was requesting for, they'd give me names of other companies and contact numbers so I could find them instead. That is really one thing I never knew of before. Thanks guys!

Missions accomplished! 2 more to go tomorrow! Hmmm ...