Seconds ticking to our Big Day

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Seconds ticking since Suzila is HIS

Sunday, 4 April 2010

The Sunday blues

My weekend started early today. I had an appointment at 8am with a traditional masseuse. Sharul picked me up after 8am and as I had guessed, my swollen feet were not normal.

I personally believe in paranormal activities around us. Recent happening at work had forced a colleague to stay home as she couldn't stand on her own .. half paralyzed? I'm not sure. The latest news I heard of her tonight was, she's doing better, alhamdulillah. As for me, the "thing" that's disturbing me I believe is living (shall I say..) in the school hall, where I recently spent time in every afternoon lately for my drama students' rehearsals. I once experienced a sudden nudge on my right hip but as I turned to see who it was, I saw nothing. I knew then that I was being "observed" ..

So, I am now under supernatural medication. I hope things will be normal again .. This is not my first encounter actually. I would be "disturbed" every time I enter a new place, especially when adventuring forests or hiking new hills. But alhamdulillah, so far nothing so severe happened to me other than suffering from body aches ..

I know Sharul is worried of my "weak" condition. He'd be there every time it happened. That is also why he seldom takes me out after dusk as I am sensitive to night weather. Yet it was me who would take any chances going out with him. It's always me making the move to watch late night movies or even dinner. This always ends us up arguing. What can I say! After the engagement, I admit, I have grown too attached to him. Too longing to him. I guess I have suffocated him to some extend ...

Anyway, the argument happened again over breakfast today. I was hurt of course but I knew it wasn't his fault. It's me who's too demanding. But it didn't take long for him to carve a smile back on my face. Today, after such many dates, we finally sat down and had one comfy time at a cafe, me forgetting what had happened this very morning. It was relaxing and I'm sure he felt at ease too like the way I was feeling :')

After movie later on, he even accompanied me to the salon. He must've figured out the pain he had caused me earlier that he let me spent unnecessary amount of money on my hair! I felt like a princess today :) And tonight, I requested him to send me home, which he did! So he was there, in his car while I was driving mine home. I felt safe all the way :')

As I got home, mom and my sister were in an argument. Little that I knew that they were talking about my wedding dates, the postponed ones. Then mom finally said to me:

"Can you change the date to early December instead? January is just too crammed with family weddings.."

"Can't. Sharul's cousins had booked all the weekends of December."

"Change it to end of November then!"

And so, that spoiled the rest of my Sunday.

I called Sharul as soon as entering my room, discussing on our wedding dates with his mom, then bam! Now, we're lost coz Sharul's first cousin has just decided on getting married at end of this November; his mom was just told today (and yes, it's another cousin! They have such big extended families!!).

Finally, Sharul said to me:

"I'll talk to your mom. Don't worry. It'll still be in January as we had planned it. I don't want any change of dates no more. It's final!"

I'm not sure if mom will listen though .. This kind of thing sometimes forces me to think many times to settle down. Why? Coz I just feel that such hassles make my dream shatter bit by bit. Every time ..

Too much ups and downs today. I guess I should go to bed now and I hope to see a beautiful dream later in my sleep .... If I ever sleep ... *sigh* :'(


amaryllis said...

This is the thing with marriage...and sometimes people overdo it with this whole 'being in a society' + 'tradition' etc etc etc. I understand that it can be super stressful but i think it's time for you n sharul to take a stand and remind both parties that it's YOU+SHARUL's wedding, not theirs. It's supposed to be a memorable day for both of you, not for others! emo aku :-p lol

izz said...

sis, lama i x buka blog... jaga diri baik2...rehat cukup2...jgn stress yaa.. hope everything will be ok...

Suzila A said...

Aiza, we're hopeless still *sigh* it's so depressing that i don't feel like getting married no more! biar la diorang jer yang kahwin kan! grrrr!!

Suzila A said...

hi Izz. how are you? lama tak blogging.. update k!

I AM AN ARIES: The Daredevil (huh??)

Energetic (yea, in many ways)

Adventurous and spontaneous (definitely)

Confident and enthusiastic (yup!)

Fun (hmm ... I should ask my friends that!)

Loves a challenge (100%)

EXTREMELY impatient (well, I hate waiting. Does that count??)

Sometimes selfish (am I??)

Short fuse; easily angered (hell yeah!)

Lively, passionate and sharp wit (hmm ... No comment!)

Outgoing (for sure!)

Lose interest quickly - easily bored (most of the time)

Egostical (in some ways; my baby says "in MANY ways" LOL!!)

Courageous and assertive (I agree!)

Tends to be physical and athletic (hmm ... Naah!!)

Fun with your photos
Created with - photo fun

My engagement: 01.01.10

My engagement: 01.01.10
Suzila Ahmad

The engagement ring :)

A cake from him

For him

With my dad & Sharul's :)

With my mum and his :)

With two of my closest girlfriends: Azean & Yanti :)