~RESPECT OR NO RESPECT~

The word 'respect' always gives me the idea of how we ‘should’ react or treat people around us. In my context of ‘respect’, as I have seen it through my up-bringing, it’s when you give extra attention to those we admire and value so much. In this sense, that would be the elders: either related or not to us; those top ranked individuals: our leaders, captains, even colleagues; and those who are in our surround community: neighbours, friends, cleaners, children, whoever! But just recently, I started questioning myself, how actually other people ‘see’ the term ‘respect’ nowadays? How do others show their respect to people around them really? Especially their respect to women.

As you all know (if you’ve read my previous blogs), I have an account in Tagged and through Tagged I met some friends with very ‘challenging’ characters. Some are scary. Some are entertaining. Some are different. Some are simply…… new! They ‘open up’ my eyes on viewing, experiencing, learning and adapting to human characters around me. Among these encounters, I learnt a different side of the word ‘respect’.

An encounter I’d say, is very different from the term ‘respect’ I have in my nurtured education. For these particular individuals, to show respect to their women is by touching them, kissing them and have that intimacy with them, even without that life-time commitment. It’s shocking as I was raised in a strong Islamic ideology that a ‘respect’ to a woman is just the ‘opposite’ of the above actions.

From what I have learnt my whole life as a Muslim, women in Islam, as written in the Kitab, are protected from those, shall I say, ‘illegal’ actions. Women and men in Islam are forbidden to do such actions before marriage. Why? This is to maintain the good name of Muslim individuals, especially women, as well as protecting them from harm in the Islamic society. Men are even required to expend a lonesome of worthy fortune to women in their marriage. This is not to show the world that Muslim parents ‘could sell’ their daughters to another, but this is for the men to show ‘respect’ and ‘appreciation’ not only to the parents of the women, but to their family roots as well. I am proud to say here that women in Islam are respected, even when they agree to their life commitment to their men of choice (or not).

Then how in the world do these people I know that respecting women should simply be the 360˚ opposite of the written norm in our Kitab? Ask yourself, would you do that to any girl you meet and show ‘that kind’ of respect to her? If that so, would you then touch, kiss and sleep with every single female species that you meet to show her ‘how much’ you respect her?? Then it would be funny if the woman is as old as your mother or even your grandmother! If you know what I mean!!! MasyaAllah!!!

Really, I still don’t get the logic learning these people’s ideas of ‘respect’ to women. It is sad knowing some men’s thoughts of ‘respect’ should be shown in ‘those ways’ while logically, women need the respect from every single soul to keep them protected, praised and honoured. When they are treated those ways, by men they meet, what would happen to these roses?? Allah knows best!

I have to thank the Tagged Team for once again, making me ‘see’ another side of the world that I am still trying to learn. May Allah protect me from the ‘respect’ of this kind of men…