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Tuesday, 19 August 2008

I Don't ... But I Do ...

Today, I stayed back till after 5pm again, finishing up preparing those reading materials for this week and next week's reading programme. It's our department's turn this time. I wasn't fasting today but I didn't have my lunch. After introducing Andrew to my colleagues, I went ahead with the extra work that's waiting on my table. I got to know Andrew from Salwa and Didi, who are my colleagues in the ORT Talk. Andrew is the sole distributor of the book sets here in Brunei.

Having known the amazing use of the books, I decided to bring in some samples of them to show my colleagues the 'magic' the books can do to our kids in school. Lulu keeps the samples now and I told her to make the list of books that she thinks would be very helpful for her students. I talked to the boss yesterday and he confirmed me that we have an extra B$5k for purchase of books so yeah, why not spend the money ;)

Lulu was browsing through the books while I was stapling the reading materials that I was arranging. While busy doing those, of course we chatted. Lulu was so excited seeing the sets of readers that she kept saying, "Oh this is good. Oh, THIS is gooooodd!!" Hehhe. I smiled and said aloud, "Thank God I don't read!" cause Lulu is just like Raheemah. They're crazy about books! Just yesterday, Lulu told me they spent hundreds of dollars on books!! I wouldn't! Ever! Books?? Just NOT me :p

Lulu knows perfectly that I don't read. I smiled when she said, "And you're giving talks on reading!" .... and I said, "I know! Ironic huh!" Hehehe :p I told Lulu, I don't read cause I 'choose' not to read. I know if I started to, I'd drop everything else in the world and hold on to whatever that's caught my eyes to read. Despite that, we moved on chit-chatting about books-related topic, a topic I usually tend to avoid or reluctant to comment on. Why? Cause I DON'T read ... Erk!! My friends mocked and made fun of me for not having the pleasure in reading while I myself am an expert (still learning though) in language. They can't see why I choose the profession of a language teacher when I myself don't ... read.

I am very different from my sister, Zima, who is just like Lulu and Raheemah, or even Suria, Salwa and Didi. Even like Irman or Zul. At home, Zima has not two but more cabinets of novels and story books, arranged perfectly in two rows per column. She even has bags of books hidden under her bed as the cabinets are already crammed with hundreds of books. Zima has sets of good books actually. She has Nancy Drews, The Hardy Boys, Stephen King's, and lots more. She's been crazy collecting them since her teen years. No wonder she got a distinction in her English Subject in O'Level. Myself? I only got Credit 6, erk!!

Our cousins sometimes come and pick a number of books to bring home to read, which Zima happily lends to. My other siblings also enjoy reading. When you come to visit, you'll see books, novels, comics, magazines, you name it, everywhere in the house. But me, it'd take guts for me to pick one and read. Something inside me would 'stop' me to even read the first sentence of whatever's written on the pages. Don't believe it? ... Believe it!!

The chit-chats continued when Lulu mentioned a book entitled "Remember Me". I nodded, agreed that I 'did' read that book when I was younger. But it turned out to be that we were talking about two different books of the 'same' title hehehe :p The one I read was about a girl who died and became a spirit that haunted the one who killed her. Lulu wanted to know the rest of the story so I told her. I then moved on telling her about another book I used to read in my teen years, which I can't recall the title.

I briefed her about the story where a girl lost her boyfriend who then became her guardian angel. He tried to match her with a guy who really liked her by sending messages in her dreams. The puzzled girl did try to find the chemistry with the guy but ended couldn't.

The last books we talked about were the Sweet Valley Twins and High series, which we both got excited about. She read them too when she was in sec school :) I found it ... 'nice' when we moved on talking about some series that we remembered reading. We laughed recalling the 'April Fool' episode, also the one when Elizabeth lost her memory and when Jessica didn't get to be the prom queen. We even remembered the boys the twins dated. Gosh! I remembered 'Todd' and Lulu was crazy about a guy Elizabeth dated in Uni :p We could talk about the series forever! Again, I smiled, this time with a different feeling about reading, when Lulu commented, "See Suzi! You DO read!!" Hmm ... Yea ... I do ... Well, correction! I DID :p

What happened today has awaken me. I DID find the joy in reading. I can't stop to wonder 'why' I don't now. It's just that, the inner side of me 'sends' the signal to my brain that I 'don't need' to read. But WHY?? Hmm ... I guess, I should try to fight those urges as I find it .... overwhelming .... when Lulu and I talked, and shared, about stuff that she and I 'enjoyed' reading when we were younger.

I like that feeling. I do :)


Princess Gizmo said...

U must read!! Hahaha even the label on the canned food!! Hehehe I did.. It just I got a habit to read anything 'readable' in front of my eyes.. Well I'm no book worm but I love reading.. So want me to lend u my japanese comics??? Hehehe..

Suzila A said...

Well, THAT, I read or else I'd get cheated for buying expired canned food kekeke :p

Japanese comics? Hehe no thanks. My bro has dozens of them at home ... which I never touched, erk!! :p

I AM AN ARIES: The Daredevil (huh??)

Energetic (yea, in many ways)

Adventurous and spontaneous (definitely)

Confident and enthusiastic (yup!)

Fun (hmm ... I should ask my friends that!)

Loves a challenge (100%)

EXTREMELY impatient (well, I hate waiting. Does that count??)

Sometimes selfish (am I??)

Short fuse; easily angered (hell yeah!)

Lively, passionate and sharp wit (hmm ... No comment!)

Outgoing (for sure!)

Lose interest quickly - easily bored (most of the time)

Egostical (in some ways; my baby says "in MANY ways" LOL!!)

Courageous and assertive (I agree!)

Tends to be physical and athletic (hmm ... Naah!!)

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My engagement: 01.01.10

My engagement: 01.01.10
Suzila Ahmad

The engagement ring :)

A cake from him

For him

With my dad & Sharul's :)

With my mum and his :)

With two of my closest girlfriends: Azean & Yanti :)